Herzog: Obama did his best to downplay the relationship.
Obama: Look, I have many, many friends on MySpace. I pretty much add anybody. I don't know who this Huey Freeman is, but he doesn't stand for what I stand for. And I denounce, I repudiate and I condemn him. Basically, fuck him.
Huey: Eh. I'm retired.
Herzog: So, then, now that it looks like Obama's going to win, as a black African-American negro, are you merely excited, or are you extremely excited that everything is going to change forever?
Herzog: I felt my sphincter clinch in my scrotum contracting shock at his response.
Granddad: I swear that boy just likes to be miserable. He can't enjoy nothin'.
Herzog: I find it difficult to determine whether Robert is a pathological liar or suffering the early stages of dementia. So if the election's fake, what's really going on?
Huey: The end of America.
Herzog: I felt despair so terrible I briefly considered slitting my own wrists or bludgeoning myself about the head with a steel pipe or a baseball bat. But I brought no blade, no pipe, no bat.
Herzog: Describe Riley Freeman in one word.
Riley: Um... I say "Real nigga".
Herzog: "Real nigga" is two words.
Riley: I know it's two words, nigga. Real niggas don't follow instructions.
Herzog: This is Robert Freeman's other grandson, Riley. He's empowered by the prospect of a black president, not in the way society would hope or expect.
Herzog: This is Otis Jenkins. But in the United States, he's better known by his rap moniker, Thugnificent. A combination of the words "thug" and "magnificent". Otis has found success like many negro American entertainers today by being a professional buffoon. Are you supporting Barack Obama?
Thugnificent: For what?
Herzog: For president.
Thugnificent: President of what?
Herzog: You don't know there's a black man running for president named Barack Obama.
Thugnificent: His name is Barack? For real?
Herzog: Barack Obama, yes.
Thugnificent: Get the fuck outta here. Barack?
Herzog: Barack, yes.
Thugnificent: Where's he from, Africa?
Herzog: His dad was African, yes.
Thugnificent: You can't be serious, man. There ain't no nigga running for president named Barack Obama. No fucking way. No fucking way. I don't believe you, stop fucking with me.
Herzog: Obama, of course, is as polarizing as he is transformative. Some have accused Obama of being a socialist. Others believe he is a Muslim. Some have gone as far as to label him the Anti-Christ.
Ruckus: He is the socialist Muslim Anti-Christ.
Herzog: This is Uncle Ruckus. He's an Uncle Tom, perhaps the biggest Uncle Tom to have ever lived.